It’s summer, and “Dance Your Ass Off” is back on the air. No sign of bringing back “More to Love”, but here’s hoping. One one hand, as a watcher, I think, “Yeah! look at these girls with their self confidence! Good for them! Damn, they dance better than me…” the other half of me thinks, “WTF are they WEARING! Can’t they get that girl some SPANKS?!”
This is a really strange place I’m caught between. I want to support these chicks for being brave, going out there, losing some weight, and not crucifying them like the average women is subjected to. I live in a world where the almighty glass of wine and snack/food/meal loaded with corn syrup is norm, and we can’t figure out why we’re all so damned fat. And yet each year brings us thinner and thinner models on our magazines (the same magazines that tell us to buy more expensive clothes and have more sex with our boyfriends… Hmm… Who is writing these magazines anyway?!)
Here’s also to wondering… What would happen if America exposed itself to more of this type of cinematography? A more realistic focus on what we actually look like, a more honest approach to the American Overweight Epidemic?
According to a magazine article I read awhile ago, I wear an average woman’s pant size (immediately begin to criticize myself that many women in that survey have had two or three kids and THAT’S why they’re so big – WHOA, hold the phone, why am I thinking this?!) I feel so more than average. In a not flattering way. What would happen if I thought the opposite? Would I go shopping more, instead of visually crucifying myself in the mirror and punishing myself for hours upon hours because I haven’t fit my big, gigantic ass into some pants that are getting smaller (probably because they’re outsourced to another country where people are smaller anyway?!) I’d walk out happier, not ultimately condemning myself ALL DAY for it.
I go through weird phases. Twice now in my life, once in my sophomore year of college and again my second year out of college or so; I’ve lost interesting amounts of weight in short periods of time as a result of a great period of self-loathing, dedication, and discipline. And all for the wrong reasons. Twice now I’ve gone on really strict diets because I let people convince me I was too fat. And those two times REALLY got me somewhere; let me tell you – I still ended up alone and more self-judgmental than ever. But, now that I’m older, it’s different (by that I mean, it’s not just dieting. That alone won’t save you). This year, I’ve actually worked out more than I usually have over a 26 year existence, on a more consistent scale than usual. I’ve participated in two running events. But, I’ve also gained some weight in the past year and a half. Because of that, I feel like I am fatter than ever.
EVERY BODY IS DIFFERENT… I share DNA with a girl who’s tall and tan(ish) and thin and brags about her high metabolism. Sigh. Why did I end up the junkyard of our DNA split? (Whoops, there goes that self-judgement again!) (Stop it Mer, stop it RIGHT NOW!)
How’d we get here? Here’s some facts about this awesome world we’ve created:
- The current media ideal of thinness for women is achievable by less than 5% of the female population.
- Up to 8 out of 10 women will be dissatisfied with their reflection, and more than half may see a distorted image.
- Research shows that men generally have a much more positive body-image than women – if anything, they may tend to over-estimate their attractiveness. (okay, so THIS is why shows like King of Queens and 2 and a Half Men are actually able to exist…)
- 25 years ago, top models and beauty queens weighed only 8% less than the average woman, now they weigh 23% less.
- In one American survey, 81% of ten-year-old girls had already dieted at least once. A recent Swedish study found that 25% of 7 year old girls had dieted to lose weight – they were already suffering from ‘body-image distortion’, estimating themselves to be larger than they really were. Similar studies in Japan have found that 41% of elementary school girls (some as young as 6) thought they were too fat.
WHY do we DO this to ourselves? What can be done about it?
I guess it starts with us. 
STOP criticizing yourself. Okay, I have a little cellulite. Guess what? I also don’t run around in the woods all day foraging for berries or dead squirrels like a wild animal would. Look at that and say, “well, I did that awesome thing today, plus I live in captivity,” and then think of three healthy things you’ve done that day. Put on a facemask or go praise that wonderful beauty mark you have… Or just some trait you really, really like.
Spread the word. Start the loving. Stop the self-judgement 🙂 (someone please text this to me the next time I go shopping!)
