Author: AkirahWyatt
[Came across this doing my usual blog research. Pretty good points made here!]
I am a glutton for celebrity gossip. US Weekly, Perez Hilton.com, and TMZ bring me incredible joy and I’m not ashamed to admit it. In my eyes, Joel McHale is a genius and I could watch him on The Soup until the cows come home. I’m not sure where my love for celebrity sleaze comes from; perhaps I was a paparazzo in a past life. If so, I’d love to go back to that past life, even just for a day, and live it up, nosily and intrusively.
One of my favorite celebrities to keep tabs on is Heidi Montag (though, I guess I should refer to her as Heidi Montag-Pratt, given her recent “elopement”). Her inability to clearly think through major life decisions is astonishing, yet somewhat understandable. At 22, she is a fellow quarter-life lady facing many of the same issues we face everyday. Poor Heidi gets dogged for a lot of the things she does because she’s in the spotlight, but I’d argue that millions of young women our age make just as stupid, if not more stupid decisions with their lives as well. I think we’d all benefit greatly by reflecting on the lessons we can learn from Heidi.
Let’s be honest here. Her life is like a bad car accident. It reminds you of the mess that can happen if you’re not careful. It’s painful to look at but you just can’t help but watch…
1. If most of your friends and family members hate your boyfriend, there may be a good reason why.
Quarter-life women are highly skilled in making excuses for their substandard boyfriends. If you’ve ever had a substandard boyfriend, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Our friends and family plead with us to see the light until finally they give up and pray that one day we’ll wake up in the middle of the night and exclaim, “Eureka!” We grow accustomed to saying the words, “You just have to get to know him like I know him,” that we can say them in our sleep. Blah, blah, blah…yadda, yadda, yadda…most of us have been there.
I don’t fault Heidi for going through this stage because she has every right to get the “he’s not perfect, but I love him anyway” bug out of her system. Actually, I am a firm believer that while people can’t change people, situations and time can. I’m not the biggest fan of Spencer, but I do believe he loves Heidi (in his own twisted way) and if he knocked her up, he’d more than likely step up and be a man. I think he’s pretty immature, but if she had made him wait a few years before marrying him, he’d probably be less selfish then than he is now.
But whether or not Heidi should have married Spencer is not the point. She’s a grown ass woman and who she loves and spends her time with is her business. I only object to her refusal to give herself sufficient time and space to reflect upon the criticisms of her family and friends. By isolating herself from all her loved ones (except, of course, Spencer) she is doing herself a disservice. I would bet there are few women in the world who think, “Damn! I wish I hadn’t listened to my friends and family and got married sooner!” Ladies, let’s not follow in Heidi’s example when it comes to our relationships. Let’s seek the wisdom of older females and let’s analyze that wisdom before making rash decisions in our love lives. No, I’m not telling you to dump that substandard boyfriend of yours. I’m just imploring you to rationally think before marrying him.
2. If your boyfriend talks too much, don’t invite him to work events (especially if there will be alcohol present).
In its beginning stages, it’s highly likely that your career will become a top priority in your life. Career success positively correlates with quality of life. Without our careers, we have no money, no health insurance, and little hope for the future. For these reasons, it’s important to avoid doing things that may jeopardize your career, especially when you’re building up a good reputation. Many women who lived before us would’ve loved a chance at a career, so let’s not eff ours up.
There are several things that don’t jive well with the world of work. I’d say alcohol, drama, and pompous boyfriends top the list. There’s nothing a boss hates more than to see a young, smart, and promising employee associate herself with bad company and compromise his/her organization’s good name. If your boyfriend is an opinionated and talkative jackass, keep him away from your workplace. If you don’t, you may end up like Heidi, sitting in a cubicle, demoted and sad.
3. Find what you love to do and expose your passion to others only if you’re good at doing it.
“Everyday I dreamed of becoming a pop star like one of my idols. I am inspired by Jesus, Janet Jackson, Christina Aguilera, Michael Jackson, Madonna, Britney Spears, Prince, Elvis, and many, many more.” (excerpt taken from Heidi’s official Myspace page)
If you ever have any free time, take a moment to visit Heidi’s official Myspace page and listen to a couple of her music tracks. It shouldn’t take you long to realize that she won’t be nominated for any Grammys anytime soon. Indeed, she is a beautiful girl, but as of now, she’s simply not talented enough for a music career or charismatic enough to be an entertainer. No matter how much Jesus inspires her, homegirl cannot sing. End of story.
Learn from Heidi’s embarrassing attempt at a career change. If you strongly desire to pursue a passion, seek feedback from others before you go public about it. Refine your passion by investing in some professional development or training. And don’t be hasty! Imagine how better off Heidi would be if she had asked for professional opinions, got some voice lessons, and waited a few years before releasing a CD.
Sadly, there are many more lessons that can be learned from Heidi’s life. Her case is so unfortunate, but any one of us could resemble Heidi if we’re not careful. So the next time one of her crazy antics is featured on the front cover of US Weekly, think twice before you shaking your head and calling her a “stupid blonde” under your breath. Show some sensitivity towards her because her life is in a shambles. The least you can do is try to learn from her mistakes.
